Stuff you don't need to know about me

I am not really into amputees, I much prefer midgets.

I entered a pie eating contest once. I lost.

I played ice hockey as a child, but rarely anymore.

I flew into Las Vegas in a private jet once.

I used to have a wicked yellow bike with a banana seat, sissy bar and streamers shooting out of the handlebars.

I've seen Dio.

Ashley almost got me arrested. Twice.