Kill me....

I make a lousy sick person.

I have jumped out of an airplane, spoken and performed on live television in front of millions of people, I eat raw fish regularly, and I don't always look both ways when I cross the street. I am in all, a fairly fearless person.

So why is it when I get sick, I become a whimpering ball of fluff?

I swear to myself that I am dying, and that I am willing to repent all of my sins as long as the higher power can keep me alive long enough to do so.

I can't eat. Can't sleep.

Give me a time of the day and I can give you the complete television listings.
2:00pm - crap
6:35pm - crap
8:01pm - TiVo defeating crap

I become convinced that no one loves me, not even my mother, who won't jump on a plane and rush to my side with a bowl of hot chicken soup and a cold compress.

Yep, I become bitter and miserable when ill.

Makes me appreciate the little things in life though, like breathing clearly, walking without pain, sunny days, and no one is shooting at me.

All in all, life is good.

Recommend Reading

• The Power of Positive Thinking
• Awaken the Giant Within
• If Winning Were Easy, Everyone Would Do It

PS, and just for the record, Ashley has been no help at all through my time of torment....don't let her fool you.